Old men that hang out at Starbucks really like to tell each other not funny jokes.

If it is 85 degrees today - will it be 137 degrees in August?

my 4 year old daughter just told my wife she is writing in her diarrhea

I just paid a bill thru snail mail for 1st time in like a year. I feel dirty.

I predicted Manning's landing spot back on March 8th http://bit.ly/y7QKBD

At car dealer

Glad I am at work and dont have to deal with the perfect weather and ncaa hoops

Blago wore a striped shirt on his flight to Colorado.

My least favorite websites are the ones that are down.

Cold out.

bears got brandon marshall!

if i know the Bears - they will not get either vincent jackson or mario williams